As LDS sayings go, "avoid the appearance of evil" is probably one of the most frequently heard. Although I think it is good to avoid looking like you're doing something evil when you're in actuality not, I've decided its far worse to be actually doing something evil and making it look like you are, in fact, doing something good.
I've noticed that when we have friends over, I'm inevitably doing some last minute cleaning before guests arrive to make it look like I am the perfect goddess of a wife that can keep a straight house. Dishes are quickly whisked into the dishwasher. Randomly strewn shoes and socks are placed in their proper locations. Sweeping, clutter control, dusting, and bed making can also take place in my 10 minute last ditch effort. As I began thinking about my motives, it made me wonder if what I was doing was wrong. Do I want to appear to be the perfect house cleaning goddess? Or do I actually want a clean house and figure that that's as good a time as any? I really do love to have a clean house. I just struggle getting everything done all the time. But it did make me stop and think.
So I say, "Avoid the appearance of good for appearance sake." I think the Lord would much rather we actually be good than appear good. This can apply to many very serious situations (such as abuse in all its ugly forms), but I'll keep it light for now.
Who wants to be the nice, shiny, delicious looking apple if you have rotted from the inside? Not me. I want to be the succulent and deliciously crisp apple with a slight hint of tart (to keep things interesting).
9 comments:
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Just don't start avoiding good things because you're suspect of your intentions. My poor brother is borderline inactive because he doesn't want to be seen doing things that some people do just to keep up appearances.
You goddess you.
Haha. Thanks th. That's good advice.
My grandma emailed me after reading this and said,
"I'll give you my take on last minute cleaning for guests. Don't question your motives...I do it to honor my guests...they deserve to come and visit in a tidy place. I think that is doing good for the right reason. And, I think that is really what you are doing, too. There, do you feel better about yourself now?"
Haha. also good advice.
OH, and just so you know, the house cleaning thing was just what started me thinking of this subject. I really don't think it's wrong to clean your house, whatever you purposes may be.
I do think it's wrong to have illintentions. Lots of times it's not the action that's wrong but the motive. You know, it's the whole "Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loves a cheerful giver" (2 Cor. 9:2) type a thing.
Really I think things like parents who look perfect (in public and at church or whatever) but are mean to their families at home are the dangerous side of this.
I have known people who were abused as children but no one believed them for a long time because there was no way their father could do such a thing. (I mean, he's such an upstanding citizen. How dare you accuse him of such a thing.)
Those are the real rotten apples.
Good post. I think it's good that we all sincerely re-evaluate ourselves and our motives, etc. It keeps us going in the right direction.
Also, YES! Clean houses are heavenly! I was just mentioning to my husband over the weekend how excited I will be for the day when he's graduated and can turn in the 150+ books he has checked out from the library at any given time and we can move to something larger than a 500 square foot one-bedroom apartment that has room to one that has for a filing cabinet for all of his research files. So looking forward to that day...
Also, props to your grandma...I like her way of thinking.
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Wise woman.
Unlike me. I only clean before guests arrive to avoid getting arrested.
no one cracks me up as consistently as th. good old th.
i always try to be grateful for a reason to get the house really clean like guests coming over. i love a clean house, but it is a pretty big effort to get it and keep it really "company clean."
It also depends on who is coming over! With three kids my house is rarely clean and those who know me just accept that fact! I guess it is pathetic that I don't try to put up the appearance!
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Th.at's me.
Good point Julie. I call those people "back door friends." People who can stop by and come through the back door and see what life is really like, unlike the "front door friends" who we keep contained in the only room that stays really clean. well, that's the theory, but unfortunately this house we are in now doesn't have a floorplan that naturally keeps the kids out of the front room like it should. but that front room is high on my st of priorities if we build our next house.
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