Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Deep Breath

More tears today.

Some came from anticipating my parents' leaving tomorrow morning.

Some came as I was realizing that Dean will never again be the boy he was and I will never again be the mother I was just one week ago.

It's all a part of life, I know.

Every phase of life has made me a different person, and has provided new opportunities for growth. I'm usually just fine closing old chapters and starting new, but this has felt a little harder. I am very happy to have our little Walt. I just need to come to terms with the fact that life will be different and I won't be able to meet all of Dean's, Walt's, Matt's and/or my needs all the time. I also need to figure out how to let Dean know I love him when I can't hold him. Additionally, I need to figure out how to teach Dean that Walt is fragile so I can keep Dean from killing him out of jealousy and/or love.

As a side note: Dean is completely avoiding our bedroom and is still pained an panicked at the rocking chair being in there.

1 comment:

Juls said...

hang in there!