You see, I went to a Lia Sophia party (think Pampered Chef party but with cute and trendy jewelry instead of cooking stuff) the other night. While those who have met me in the last 10 years might find it odd, I did at one point in time wear make up, necklaces, and dangly earrings. My interest in such things just petered out over the years.
But there's still a bit of a girly-girl inside of me that enjoys those things, and she was bursting to get out after that party!
There were a handful of pieces I wanted. The total would have run me just over $100 (with the discounts) for the 3 top items on my list. For someone who's never actually purchased anything nicer than Claire's junk jewelry, just thinking about spending that much for 3 items made me want to gag. But they were so cute! And with a lifetime guarantee!! I went back and forth all weekend like I had the little angel and devil on my shoulders.
The little devil: Buy them. Your previous frugality makes up for this one purchase.
The little angel: You don't need them. Your money will be better spent (or saved) elsewhere.
The little devil: But you really could use a little sprucing up. You're not a poor college kid any more. You can afford a necklace or two.
The little angel: How often will you really wear them anyway???
Me: Fine. FINE! I won't get any jewelry.
*shed a tear and feel sorry for myself*
Seriously. I shed a tear and felt sorry for myself. And then I started a blog rant about how how I'm sick of living like I have no money to spare, etc. etc.
And then I remembered one line from that Saturday night Stake Conference meeting (I'm telling you, it really was a good meeting). Someone was talking about money and spending:
"Financial well being isn't a function of income but of the relationship of income to expenditure. Don't live during the up times as though they will never end."
So, even though I can afford them now that doesn't mean I deserve them or need them. (Most of us really don't want what we truly deserve. Thank heavens for the atonement!) It doesn't mean that down the road I'd be able to afford them either. Who knows what's in store?
And then I started thinking about how blessed I am that it's even an issue of should or shouldn't I buy this necklace. At least it wasn't "Can I or can't I afford to feed my family today?". Necklace or no necklace, I have it pretty good.
(Matt said it was my decision. Now, I don't really think it would have been that big of a deal if I'd bought it, but honestly, it wasn't necessary right now. Maybe I'll find something of theirs I like on ebay sometime for cheap.)
10 comments:
I'm not alone in my obsessing and obsessing and then not buying! I'm glad you were so candid about how bummed it made you because that sounds much like my inner monologues when it comes to purchases for myself.
I am the exact same way. I hate spending any money, especailly on myself. Like if we want to go out and have fun, I just don't want to spend the money, I would rather save it. I think it comes from not having much as a kid...I used to tell Chris all I wanted was "dressers" for our kids beucase I had to use milk crates for my clothing growing up. It is better to save and I try to remember that we will take nothing with us to the next life, but I do want fun family memories. We do live in a world of materialism.
Oh Randa. You're not alone. Anything between 20-30 is a toss up. Anything over 30 I ask Matt. Anything over $50 just feels frivolous.
Jodi, I love spending money and buying cute things. (Though I do love finding a "good deal".) I just hate that guilty feeling I get after doing so!
I just want to make it clear I don't think buying jewelry, going on trips, going to the movies, buying music, etc. is inherently bad. I think the accompanying attitude has a lot of weight in the matter.
And it's important to prioritize and make sure your ducks are in a row and the stars are aligned correctly. It just wasn't the right time for me to get these things.
Lovely post, Celia. My personality splits in a very similar way each time a big (and sometimes a not-so-big) purchase comes up. Usually the frugal side wins, and usually I'm okay with that (I'm big into saving money for later). But sometimes....sometimes it's just hard. It's hard not to feel like I'm still that poor college kid without a salaried income. My situation now is quite a bit different: I'm helping to head up a household, my husband has that salaried income, which I use to buy the things our family needs. Money's still tight, but there's definitely more wiggle room than there was, say, five years ago. Sometimes I throw myself a pity party, but, like you did, I remember how vast my blessings really are and give myself a good kick in the pants. Besides, I often tell myself, I don't NEED more stuff. Where in the world would I put it? And I certainly don't want to make another cross-country move toting THAT extra baggage around. :)
You could always host one of the parties, and then get the jewelry for a serious steal. (I got an $86 necklace for $4.) Just saying...
My head seems to feel that--unless it's on the clearance rack--I don't need it. Seriously...you would think that I'd realize that a clearance-priced 15 buck shirt costs the same as a regularly-priced 15 buck shirt. But, I just like seeing "clearanced" or something. I don't get it...
very well put! I would have avoided the whole party just so I wouldn't have to make the decision! Good for you!
So that made me laugh- but such a true lesson behind it all. It's so easy to spend money when you have it (but not always the smartest)! I would love to buy nice stuff but alas, most of those things will have to wait. :)
I say you go spend about $20 on some jewelry and make yourself feel better. Then you have some jewelry AND $80 to boot. I have also found that you can find just about any of those party-plan items on eBay for at LEAST half price. I am like Brooke--I have never paid full price for anything in my life unless it was an absolute necessity. Seriously, I buy my clothes off of the Kohl's 80-90% off rack when they are under $5.
Kristeee, I thought of having a party, but I don't think I know anyone who'd come and buy stuff.
Amanda, I like your thoughts. I did check ebay for the things I wanted. One was on there but for $40 still.
Oh, and Brooke, while the $15 shirt on sale and the $15 shirt regular price are both $15, it's a higher likelihood that the one on sale is higher quality. So, you are justified. =)
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